I wonder how David felt when, in one day, he went from being an ordinary shepherd to anointed King over Israel? I wonder how Esther felt in her role as queen after being just an ordinary girl for so many years? What about Peter, who went from being a rough fisherman to holding the keys to the kingdom? We know from reading their stories that these people stood out and became mightily used of God...but how did they feel at first? In the beginning? Did it feel awkward? Did they wonder, "How did I end up here? Is this really where I belong?"
The Lord tells us that when we are in Christ, we are new creatures. (2 Corinthians 5:17) It's easy to understand that. Yet, as we grow in Christ, things within us begin to change. We begin to take on His nature. We learn to overcome obstacles, respond differently, etc.. We grow. We change from what we were to more of what God intends for us to be - and that's the whole idea anyhow, isn't it?
Whenever the light comes on and I realize I'm making progress in a certain area, a few things happen. At first it feels kind of awkward. You see, it kind of goes like this for me:
1) There is a sense of relief as I realize I finally "got it",
2) a moment of awe that God helped me through it
3) and then, that moment where the enemy mocks quietly:
"You don't really have it together, you're going to mess
up again. You don't deserve to be here! Your fake, go back
to what your comfortable with. This isn't YOU!"
Wow! That's a lot to take in, isn't it? He's such a wimp! He knows when we're weak and unsure - when we're learning to take baby steps in a new area. However, we know that God has wonderful plans for us. Our greatest enemy knows that too and he hates us for it. He'd rather us stay stuck in the muck or jump off the cliff - just NEVER move forward. He'll fight tooth and toenail to see God's wonderful works spoiled. Just give him a chance!
I wonder at times if David didn't feel totally out of his league. Was there ever a moment when he heard the evil whispers: "You belong with the sheep, not in the palace."? Was there ever a brief moment when Esther questioned God's plan for her - even in such a time as this? They were normal people just like us. Remember the anguish Peter felt as he realized he had failed Jesus? How the enemy must have laughed and mocked him during that low point in his life! But God didn't give up on Peter...and Peter didn't give up on God. It was a growing experience. He stood on that cliff with a choice.
When we find ourselves in a NEW place in God, if we're growing and changing with Him, we just have to hang in there, knowing that it won't always feel comfortable at first. We might even feel a bit fake at times. After all, we've always acted a bit differently in this situation before. True, it's a different view from up here, but as we grow into this new way of life, it will become second nature to us. Until that happens, let's not listen to the enemy who'd rather have us jump off and totally ruin God's plan. Don't listen to his evil whispers of "WARNING!" Let's trust our Guide to lead us completely and safely to new heights in Him. Soaring with Him to new and unknown heights is definitely where we belong.
But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint. Isaiah 40:31